How long did it take? Three weeks? Just three short weeks of social isolation. Three weeks of DIY workouts, DIY takeouts, and DIY cocktails, before I finally cracked.
Last night I did a DIY haircut. I gave myself bangs. With the kitchen scissors – basically, the cardinal sin of styling. I’m going to hair hell.
And, yes, I have heard the phrase: “You don’t need bangs, you need therapy.”
Daughter was right behind the venture. She’s been on Team Bowlcut ever since she found an old photo of me from the – cough – 80s, sporting said heinous hairstyle and looking surprisingly not awful.
Yes, that’s me in the 80s. Or maybe 90s. It’s all a blur.
The Bowl gained new momentum a couple of years ago, when Charlize Theron got the chop (though, let’s be honest, Charlize Theron could make a mullet look hot, so it’s hardly a fair barometer).
Anyhoo, there I was, hanging out on the fire escape, FaceTiming Daughter, when I’d finally had enough. I was going rogue, and nothing could stop me.
“Go for it!” she encouraged.
“Don’t do it!” cautioned my roommate.
Quarantine hair is a thing, my friends. We’re stuck at home. We’re lonely. We’re bored. And we have scissors. It’s a dangerous combination, as any psychiatrist will tell you. Plus, there’s no one to see the epic fail (except in that Zoom call where you suddenly, inexplicably, start wearing hats).
If Taika Waititi can let his two young daughters give him a buzz cut, I could give myself bangs.
I marched into the bathroom and began slicing at my hair, red locks tumbling into the sink.
I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking this is going to be one of those horror stories, where I end up bald, or with 3mm bangs. Or … this?
I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.
TELL A FRIEND
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NEW YORK STORIES
Dr Amir Mortazavi is heading back to the ER – the eye of the storm – after recovering from COVID-19. Read his – and other hero stories – at w42st.com.
A little Randy Rainbow magic for all you Cuomo lovers out there. Oh Andy …
DO THESE THINGS
The Joylist Social has gone digital – but it’s no less fun. Designed to encourage social connection, make friends, and spark joy, you’ll be signing up for meditation, games, silliness, shenanigans, and a little live music. It happens tonight. Find out more.
Run through the pandemic
Tonight’s webinar dives into what running teaches us about overcoming adversity, as well as tips on how to stay motivated, push yourself without a goal, and find inner strength. Find out more.
Get real answers
Coping with anxiety. Navigating relationships. Cultivating joy in isolation. These and more questions are covered in Rachel Wright’s Distanced Not Alone pop-up support group. Find out more.
See the supermoon
Tonight’s pink supermoon is going to be the biggest and best of the year. Get ready, Instagram.
Fall asleep to Dolly
Every Thursday night, the divine Dolly Parton reads a bedtime story, and I can’t think of anything more reassuring. “I think it is pretty clear that now is the time to share a story and to share some love.” Her reading of The Little Engine that Could is currently online, and I couldn’t love it more.
OK, when we all get out of this, what’s the one thing you’ll never take for granted again?
I’ll go first. Hi everyone, I’m Ruth. Hugs.
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